i realized, just a few hours ago, that today is 11 months. i've been pretty adolescent about how things have been going; i've got this thing down!! yet...YET...the year is rolling around pretty quickly now and i am feeling like a broken-down girl. this fucking sucks and i am really about to break. and what was my last, long-winded post about?
boo-hoo, poor me and my lost vaginal birthing experience where i got three live babies. and poor me again, because i couldn't even birth my dead one, but i didn't think about that then because i was too depressed during the seven or so months leading up to that wondrous finale of darkness.
this really is like the fucking mafia. DON'T EVEN THINK YOU CAN LEAVE...BECAUSE YOU CAN'T!!! and the more you think you have? well, the last laugh is on this vicious cycle, that's for god damned sure.
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do not judge by mere appearances; for the light laughter that bubbles on the lip often mantles over the depths of sadness, and the serious look may be the sober veil that covers a divine peace and joy
about
- charmedgirl
- after 4 years of infertility, IVF, and a high-risk yet successful triplet pregnancy, we thought one baby girl created the old-fashioned way would be a piece of cake; that's not what happened. we miss you paige...stillborn at 40 weeks on her due date, 9.9.07.
or so we thought...
- a little pregnant
- a mending heart?
- afterwards
- anarchist mom
- antigone lost
- awful but functioning
- broken heart diaries
- dead baby jokes
- diary of a domestic diva
- i won't fear love
- it's a strange world
- letters to the babies that lived
- losses and gains
- mi isla sola
- missing micah
- my new reality
- my resurfacing
- oh well
- paw prints
- postsecret
- quiet sanctuary
- SAHM of 3
- the para.graph
- this is not what i had planned
- yummy sushi pajamas
4 comments:
Oh, Charmy, I'm so sorry. You're right: we're in this for good, regardless of whether we think we've managed to get out somehow.
XO.
So true about the Mafia...that was a one-way ticket we all got, without realizing it.
I think they might eat better in the mafia. Just sayin'.
Thinking about you on the lead-in to September. The anticipation is so hard.
thinking of you..
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